Thursday, January 6, 2011

Farewell 2010

I was going to do a recap of the wonderful things I did, the fun people I spent time with and the great adventures I experienced, but I realized that is what my posts this past year are about. When I look back at this online journal of mine I want to be able to recall what I learned from this past year, what accomplishments I made and what struggles I am working to get through.

This past year has made me realize more than ever that family is very important, yet isn't always easy to manage. My family has been through some rough times with health and personal issues. I think our family dynamics have been shaken up over the past year more than any other thus far. As dysfunctional as we may be sometimes we are still a family and will always care for one another. As any relationship, this will continue to be a work in progress.

Unfortunately, my grandfather's health is continuing to decline. Fortunately he lives close to us (daughter and granddaughters) and we have the opportunity to be there for him when he needs us. My grandfather has always been a big part of our lives and has done so much for us. It is important for us to be able to return the favor and take care of him in this time of need. In addition, it is nice to continue to grow our relationship with him. He loves to be around family and thrives on sharing his life experiences with anyone that will listen. I am amazed at the life he has lived.

My mother is coming to terms with the fact that my sister and I are no longer her 'little girls'. She will always be our mother and I will always cherish the relationship we have, but it is true that we are growing up and don't need her approval when making decisions anymore. I think giving up some of that control has been hard on her (and me). I will always need my mother, but the ways I need her are different now than they have been in the past.

Although we haven't been close with some of our extended family in the past. My sister and I have made a conscious effort to reconnect (thanks to Facebook). We are lucky in that a lot of our extended family is close in proximity and we have the opportunity to spend time with each other. Growing up makes you realize how important even extended family is. I am so happy this is something we have worked on (must give props to my sis here). I really do enjoy being around my crazy family!!

My friends are my rock. I don't have TONS of fair weather friends, I have a handful of very close friends. I was even able to spend some time with some great friends from my past that I would have never thought possible (again thanks to Facebook). Although timing isn't always on our side, when we are able to get together, it's as if we haven't skipped a beat. I would do anything for my friends and know they would do anything for me. I tried to let my friends know how much they mean to me and to keep in touch as best I could this past year. I continue to do so for years to come.

This past year I was honored to help celebrate with friends as they got married, moved into new homes and/or welcomed a baby into this world. It must be true that we are growing up!! It has been so wonderful to see my friends grow and experience some life changing events with them. I couldn't be happier for every single one of them! I just wish we all had more free time to get together (another characteristic of being an adult).

I personally have worked a lot this past year with setting boundaries and trying to re-teach myself that in order to make others happy, I need to be happy first. This is not an easy transition for myself or for some of those around me. I can't help but feel selfish putting myself first, but am understanding more and more that it is necessary.

I have regretted some of the decisions I have made in the past, but have learned to deal with those decisions and not dwell on them. I used to always beat myself up for "making the wrong decision". I have gotten used to the fact that at the time, I made the best decision I thought possible. There is no question that had I known then what I know now I would have made a different decision, but that is impossible. I am finally allowing myself to move forward from these decisions even if out of my comfort zone. I am hopeful that 2011 will see this chapter come to a close so I can move on with my life and learn from the whole experience.

Another part of 'me' I have been working on has been my health. I have come to terms with the fact that I will probably never be as skinny as I was back in the day, but I have also come to understand why losing weight is important to me. I have health issues that are not too serious at this point, but isn't getting any better with me being overweight. The past several months I have learned to be disciplined enough to get some sort of physical activity in several days a week (even got back into running and picked up yoga). I am not as quick/strong as I once was, but I am working on simply being healthy in addition to liking what I see in the mirror.

My relationship with Mr. Pickle has grown more than I even thought possible. He has been by my side through all my/our challenges and has helped me stay optimistic. I am so blessed to have a husband that is always there for me and keeps an open mind to my ideas. He definitely is my other half. I can't believe that 2010 marked 10 years of being together. If someone would have told me ten years ago where we would be today I wouldn't have believed them...ten years later, I couldn't imagine it any other way. Plus, I just LOVE to watch him interact with our little niece. Too cute!

This about sums up what my year was like. I am sure I could go on, but I think it has gotten long enough!!

Farewell 2010 & Welcome 2011!

1 comment:

Ashley @ KiwisandCocktails said...

Yey for a new year!
This was a great post and you really did a lot of self reflection! :) I enjoyed reading it.