30 by 30 Thursday

Since the gym down the street from my work is closed for the month of December (are they trying to help people gain weight during the holidays?), I am back to running outside and am continuing with my yoga. I love both of these activities, just wish running didn't hurt my knees so much!! Yesterday I even ran in the rain, which wasn't too horrible except then I got cold sitting through work a tab bit wet.

In an effort to cut back our spending our hard earned money on food while dining out, Mr. Pickle and I are trying to eat out as little as possible. I even cooked dinner one night this week!! I know this will help with not only the amount of calories I consume, but also the amount of sodium (which my doctor advised I need to stay away from).

Some snacks I am enjoying this time of year are Granny Smith apples with RF peanut butter or Laughing Cow cheese, Persimmons, Healthy Pop Kettle Corn - 100 calorie bag, blueberry Special K bars and raw almonds.

Anyone have any good recipe for some low fat treats to celebrate the holiday?

I Guess I'm Loved

I think my dog loves me/us too much!!! Every time I/we leave he gets all anxious and freaks out. Either he tears stuff up or he paces around the house panting (I can tell because of all the wet droplet spots all over the floors).



I feel so bad for him because his separation anxiety has gotten so bad again. He was adopted from the Hawaiian Humane Society almost 5 years ago. He did good for the first couple months and then he started shaking when I would leave him. Since I worked with my mom out of her house, I was allowed to bring him to work with me. He continued to shake but it didn't get too bad until a few years later.



One day he was in my grandpa's backyard when we went to lunch and we came home to find an empty yard. It took two long, miserable days before he eventually came back home because he was so hungry. Ever since his separation anxiety has been worse.



Eventually we put him on medication that had an adverse affect, so we had to take him off of it. We worked with a trainer for a while and put him on puppy Prozac and he was doing okay. That was until he escaped from our yard in July and hasn't been the same since.



We used to be able to leave the doggie door in for the dogs and there wasn't a problem and now he immediately goes to the gate (where he gets out) when we are just getting ready to leave. We now keep the dogs locked inside and I go home every day at lunch to let them out. One day he unlocked the sliding glass door and got out of the yard.



He has destroyed several things and would rather come to work with me and sit in my car than be left alone. I guess it is time to shell out the money to go back to working with a trainer.



Poor pup, he loves us so much he can't stand for us to leave him. Lucky for him, we love him just as much and will do whatever it takes to work this out!! Let's just hope he doesn't ruin everything or hurt himself in the process.



Photo by Marcie Lynn Photography

Weekend in Tahoe

I just realized I never posted about a fun little weekend we had in Tahoe a month or so ago. Nothing too exciting, just went up to our family cabin with another couple and relaxed! Here are the pics from a little fun we had our last day there (the other couple had already headed home)...

Puka in his new 49er shirt Satch HATES getting his picture taken

Photo op with the scarecrow

Photo op on the lake

And on the way home we saw a sandwich place...

I love Tahoe!

Weekend Review - Sans Pictures

A very productive weekend, but not in the picture taking department!

Friday night Mr. Pickle made a lovely meal. We ate and enjoyed some vino while catching up on some DVR flicks and headed to bed early!

Saturday morning I woke up waaaaay to early for a Saturday (5:00 am) and stayed in bed relaxing for a few hours. Mr. Pickle and I went for a quick breakfast and then I went to spend some time with my grandpa. Gramps and I ran some errands and he took me to a nice lunch. Afterwards I joined one of my friend's while she tried on her wedding gown that just came in. Her wedding is in May and she has given me the honor of being one of her bridesmaids. She looks STUNNING in the dress, but there was never really a doubt in my mind that she wouldn't (I have pics of her in the dress but figured I shouldn't share just in case). Later that night we had dinner with Mr. Pickle's parents and watched Grown Ups. Funny movie!!!

Sunday we had a nice breakfast followed by a lot of running around and some cleaning/laundry. It was POURING, so we didn't go get our tree as planned. Hopefully this week. We did watch Home Alone and Elf to get in the Christmas spirit. We watch Christmas Vacation while decorating the tree. One of the best movies ever!!

Are you in the Christmas spirit?

Rough Patch

I know it isn't ideal to blog about the drama your going through on the internet however, like most people, this is my 'journal' so here it goes (feel free to skip this post, I won't be offended).....

I am going through a rough patch in my life and I am a ball of all sorts of emotions; anger, hurt, sadness, fear, confusion, the list goes on. Now before some people jump to conclusions, this has NOTHING to do with my marriage/husband. I prefer not to mention specific details, but worry not, my marriage couldn't be better.

I have been struggling with issues around this situation for some time and although my attempt has been to handle in a civil manner, things are getting out of control and I fear I am losing a loved one over it.

I have always been the type of person who has strived to keep other people happy and have recently been working with a counselor to put my happiness first (in a self care way, not selfish way). Apparently some people are not liking the changes I am making and that I am setting boundaries for myself because I have since been accused of being disrespectful and unappreciative. The last thing I want people to think is that I am doing these things to be mean, spiteful and selfish, but I have to do what is best for ME, I have to put my happiness before theirs.

I am so confused and am simply at a loss as to what to do. Do I simply back down and do what other people want of me even though it is not what I want for myself or what I think will make me happy or do I risk losing someone I NEVER thought I would lose? Why can't their be some compromise amongst us adults? Why does it have to be all or nothing? How am I being blamed for the way things have gone down?

What confuses me even more are the mixed signals I have been getting. One minute everything seems fine, the next minute it is finger pointing and hurtful words. One second we are enjoying conversations over the phone, the next second I am getting an email blaming me for being disrespectful and unappreciative.

All I know is I can't imagine my life without this person. At this point I am willing to do what it takes to make this situation better, but only within my boundaries (which I have expressed before). I don't think it is fair to be put in an uncomfortable situation just because it is what is best for someone else.

I hope and pray this will work out for all parties involved because I don't know if I can live without them in my life.

To be continued.....

On a lighter note, Happy Friday everyone. Hope you all enjoy the weekend!

30 by 30 Thursday

So last week was no doubt an epic FAIL in the eating healthy and working out department!!! Plus I came home with a cold, so I have been slowly getting back into my workouts.

I had a doctor's appointment earlier this week for a kidney check-up (I have a kidney disease so I have check-ups often). My doctor told me my blood pressure has been high (a side effect of the disease) the past couple of visits and now my cholesterol is high too. I have to get this weight off to help my blood pressure and lower my cholesterol!! I always thought if I had my health as a motivating factor to lose weight it would be easier than if I just wanted to look good, but I am finding that is not the case.

I have been going through a lot emotionally and the first thing that goes out the window for me is my eating habits. Last night I had a salad and small cup of soup for dinner and a few hours later (after some emotional crap went down) I sat down with a box of Cheese Itz and M&Ms :(

I am going to try to make a healthy dinner for Mr. Pickle and I at least once a week for the next month. Mr. Pickle usually does the cooking for us or we go out to eat, so this would be a step in the right direction. I wish I enjoyed cooking, but I just don't. Hopefully that will change in time.

What are positive ways you deal with your emotions?

Montana Trip

My uncle (my dad's brother) and aunt moved to Montana about 8 years ago after living in the Bay Area for most of their lives. Mr. Pickle and I had only been to visit them once since they moved (although we see them often) and it was during the fall when the temps were cooler, but nothing compared to what they were last week!!

Since my father passed away when I was a teenager, my uncle really stepped in being the father figure for my sister and I. This is still true today. He (and my grandpa) even walked me down the aisle at my wedding.

Last year we decided to visit my uncle and aunt in Montana for Thanksgiving since they seem to always be making trips to California for holidays and such. Once my sister and her boyfriend heard of the plan, they were on board as well. My uncle and aunt were excited beyond belief to have us all with them for almost a week.

Montana is beautiful!!! I love visiting, but can't imagine living in that kind of weather. How do some of you do it?!

Here is a little recap of our trip in pictures...

Mr. Pickle and I waiting to board our plane (my sis and her bf drove)

Welcome to Montana

What can I say, we love wine

My sister, uncle and I on our first night

My uncle and Mr. Pickle clearing the driveway

My sister and I supervising as the boys did work


Doing my part

Down the street from my uncle's house

Glacier National Park

View in Glacier National Park

More views


The gang at the lodge in Glacier National Park

Last view before leaving the park

I unfortunately did not get a picture of the lovely spread we had for Thanksgiving or our trip home (6:00 am flight the day after Thanksgiving does not make for any interesting pics). My sister took some AMAZING pics that you can see here!!

It went by fast, but we had a great time!!